impostor alert! or 'lady get your grimy fingers of the miniature socks'

I have found myself wandering the baby departments and stores recently, not because I'm a sad mama-wanna-be stalker, but because numerous women in my life have given birth to children in the last 6 months and so presents must be bought. From a geographical distance like this one, tangible goods are the only obvious way to show you care.

Every time I brush past a mini pink dress, or a tiny blue jumper, or let my hand caress a wood cot I'm sure the sirens are going to go off. *WARNING, BARREN WOMB ENTERING FERTILE LAND* I'm 100% confident that they know I'm not pregnant, or that I don't having children. And my crazy mind can't help but know that they think what I've got, this challenge to become a mama, is contagious. Like 'touch me and  you too will turn into an obsessive peeing-on-a-stick bump-ogling baby-head-sniffing lady'. 

Like some shop assistant is going to usher me out telling that they don't like 'my kind' in their neck of the woods. Because I'm upsetting their 'customers' with my flat (ha! like it ever will be!) belly and lack of human chorionic gonadotropin in my blood system (do they have security cameras that can see that?). (and OH MY GOD, are they ultra-sounding me on my way in to the store?)

I know, this is a scenario completely made up by my off-balance mind. And that it's perfectly reasonable that any normal person would need to buy a baby gift for a friend, or neice, or nephew. But I can't be the only lady browsing 'My Baby's First Year ' books wishing I was buying one for me, can I? (It's ok to lie hear, it's what they do to keep mental patients stable).

Comments

[Barbara]

I was very lucky with my two, we conceived fairly quickly and both pregnancies were trouble free. I still spent a good 6 months picking up tiny pairs of socks and heaving sighs.

[Liz]

Oh crikey? You mean that I'll still be stalking the baby department when pregnant? Thanks for the heads up!

[Barbara]

'Fraid so!